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Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day!
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BATHROOM RULES, if I's up….put it down, if it's on…turn it off, if it's dirty…. Clean it…..
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I'm not sure about my inner child. But I have an inner idiot that pops up every now and again!
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If I died and went to hell, it would take me a week to relise I wasn't at work!
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I try to avoid anything that makes me look fat, scales, mirrors and photographs"
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Happiness is not a destinati, it's a way of life!
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Home is where the dog hair sticks to everything except the dog!
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Home is where the cat hair sticks to everything except the cat!
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A wise woman once said "Sod this crap!" and she lived happily ever after!
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The best things in life are the people we love, the places we've been and the memories we've made along the way.
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Loo Rules. Gentlemen stand clsoer, its shorter than you think. Ladies please remain seated for the entire performance.
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Inside me is a thin woman screaming to get out, I normally shut the bitch up with chocolate!
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In this house wed o real, we do mistakes, we do I'm sorry….. We do LOVE.
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If you have to ask if its to early to drink wine… you're an amateur and we probablly shouldn't be friends!
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I got a new stick deodorant today. Instructions said "removbe cap and push up bottom" I can't walk, but..
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